The “not all men” movement and a rising frustration from women around Australia as they scream without being heard.
“I speak to you out of necessity” said Brittany Higgins, at the March 4 Justice rally outside Parliament.
In 2019, Higgins was raped inside Parliament House by a colleague and shared her experience in a hope for justice against gendered violence, which then sparked a wave of women around Australia coming forward with similar stories.
Thousands of people gathered at over 40 rallies across Australia to call for institutional change and to raise awareness of the severity of sexism and sexual assault within the country.
However, as an article by Junkee writes “Just as you can trust the sun to always set in the west, you can rest assured that whenever there’s a national crisis Prime Minister Scott Morrison will rise to the occasion by saying something incredibly tone deaf”.
The Prime Minister responded to the rallies, not by attending, but instead a brief speech calling it a “triumph of democracy” that women in Australia are able to protest without being “met with bullets”.
This comment from the Prime Minister was not long after his apology to Brittany, where he described that his understanding of the situation came from a conversation with his wife.
"Jenny and I spoke last night and she said to me, you have to think about this as a father. What would you want to happen if it were our girls?"
He said he wanted any women working in Parliament to feel as safe as possible, “as I would want for my own daughters”.
Here lies the problem. We’re not just daughters. We aren’t just little girls that need our dads to make sure we’re safe. We’re people, and we aren’t damsels in distress in need of a hero to protect us. We just shouldn’t be being raped.
“This isn’t a political problem; this is a human problem” said Brittany.
As a young girl growing up in Australia, it is so sickening for me to watch the leaders of this country stand idly by as women express their concerns and call for recognition. As brave women around the country are sharing their stories and facing ridicule, you begin to question, what if this was me? It’s not far-fetched to assume that something will happen to me, and what if I come forward and I’m too called a “lying cow”? Or what if I say something and the men that aren’t the perpetrators just shrug and say “well it wasn’t me, not all men”. What then?
We need to be listened to. It is so frustrating to be screaming ‘this is my reality’, and it being responded with ‘no, it’s not’.
I want to grow up in a country where I feel equal. Where I feel safe. And where I feel like I can call out someone in the wrong, so they’re faced to deal with the consequences. And right now, Australia is not being that for women.
It’s terrifying that this is still happening. It’s terrifying that this is happening not only in your local pubs, but Parliament House. It’s terrifying that more isn’t being done by the male leaders of this country. It’s terrifying that coming forward and sharing a traumatic experience can be met with such hatred, by being called liar. And it’s so incredibly frustrating that women are speaking out and using their voice like they have been doing for decades, and men are saying “sure, but it’s not me”, diminishing the issue altogether.
97% of women in the UK report they have experienced sexual assault within their lifetime. I’m 18 years old and majority (if not all) my female friends have a story about being touched without consent. Men put their hands on us all the time, whether it’s a hand on our waist as they get past, or raping us while we’re intoxicated and unconscious. And I’m 18 years old. Imagine the women before me that have dealt with men like this their entire lives. Imagine the women that I don’t know, that know more women that I don’t know, that all have similar stories.
It happens so frequently that it’s become normalised. A man puts his hand on your leg? Boys will be boys, right?
A man with his hand on you without consent is him indirectly telling you that to him, you’re a sexual object. Would they (a heterosexual man) put their hand on another man’s leg or waist during polite conversation? Of course not. These men are claiming you as sexual property whether they are aware of it or not.
This situation should be confronting for men. It’s confronting to realise that even in 2021, things that you might take for granted, are one’s women don’t have the same luxury of. Women every night are sharing their Uber status with their friends, or walking home with their keys between their fingers or crossing the road to avoid passing a man. We cover our drinks with our hands at bars and make sure we’re always in groups of two or more. We check the back of our car seats when we get into our cars at night. We say no to spending time with men because we feel like we owe them sex for buying us dinner. We tell men “Sorry, I have a boyfriend” because it’s a safer excuse instead of just plainly saying no.
Maybe it’s not all men, but we’re still terrified of most, and that shouldn’t be normal.
We’ve lived through this movement time and time again. Through Take Back the Night, through #MeToo, through Slutwalk. In 2019 I went to my first Women’s March in response to the tragic death of 21 year old, Aiia Maasarwe, who was raped and murdered by Codey Herrmann while walking home on a night out with friends.
It’s getting exhausting, thinking to ourselves; how much longer do we need to ask men to respect us before they actually do it?
The reality is, ignorance is not bliss. Your ignorance could mean the difference between a woman being sexually assaulted, raped or murdered, or not. Turning a blind eye and saying “not all men” then wiping yourself from the record is an ignorance that adds to the severity of the situation. Maybe it’s not you, but it’s people around you, and it’s happening everywhere and staying ignorant means women are staying in danger.
By Lucy Ballenden
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